Pillow Talk

If you guys knew how many times I started writing a post for today and then realized a few words in how much of a waste of time it was about to be and then deleted it, only to stare at a blank screen, like I spend so much of my time doing, you would leave me forever and never come back because you're smart enough not to support a crazy person in her blogging endeavors.

Lucky for me I didn't tell you about any of that so you have no idea of it.

I haven't stopped in days and it's starting to feel like I don't know which way is up. There are so many things to be constantly thinking about and making a plan on that taking 5 minutes to stop thinking feels like I'm wasting precious planning time. I like being busy for the most part, but I don't like being stressed — not that I'm ever not at least a little bit stressed — and I have a mix of both happening right now...

I've decided to register for a half marathon this October. If I can pull it off, I'll have gone from having to stop after less than one full minute of running to running 13.1 miles in one shot in exactly 10 months.

I'm a bit superstitious, and part of me is concerned that by announcing this on the blog I'll be plagued by injury between now and October. I'm planning to begin following a recommended training plan in about four weeks to help me healthily reach half marathon ready. AHHHHH.

Summer has officially been kicked off on a super high note following Memorial Day Weekend and last weekend with Dave. I'm so looking forward to all the rest we have planned for the next couple of weeks, and also for all the fun things that can only pop up spontaneously and be welcome in the freedom of summer. But part of me is already nostalgic for this summer, because I know it always flies by, and part of me wants this one to fly by, in fact.

I'm about to begin apartment hunting, and looking around for a couple of other new things — things to take up on the side and things that will take up a good, healthy chunk of my time and energy. {One of those things being Feather Magazine — are you on the mailing list yet?!} I'll share more about all these things once I have the green light and love you to the end of the earth and back for being patient with me until more of my free time is free again.

I've been offered an opportunity to advertise on this ol' blog here, which was a complete and total surprise. A flattering one, to be sure. Given the above item, though, I decided that now is not the time to begin introducing sponsored content here; however, if opportunities come up in the future, I hope you guys will understand why I would be likely to accept — for the benefit of this blog's expansion and maintenance, and in turn, the benefit of you readers who for some inexplicable reason enjoy coming and hanging out with me here. {XOXO} I also hope you know that I would never push on you a product or service I didn't try myself and believe in. Just so we're clear.  :)  But we can talk about all of that another day.

I'm trying to decide if I'm currently in a second phase of my quarter-life crisis. I absolutely had a big, bad one a couple of years ago, and this doesn't feel like that. I don't feel panicked or scared. I don't feel pressured or like I've let anyone down. I'm just starting to feel a lot differently about a lot of things than I did when I was 22. And I don't think that's a bad thing. I think, in fact, that it's kind of the point. I'm not the same person I was then, I don't have the same priorities, influences, and pressures — and that is absolutely a good thing. I feel like I'm in a great place to reorganize and refamiliarize myself with what it is I see happening in the coming years of my life, what I want to happen, and how I'll make it all happen. And for once that's not such a scary thing. It doesn't feel like I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, or scrambling to keep up with anyone else, or lost at sea alone. It feels like my own private September. It feels like everything I used to hope adulthood would be: freedom to make a change; freedom to start something from nothing; freedom to unapologetically be; freedom to learn and create and flourish.

Anyway, this is what my life looks like right now. Maybe it seems terrifying to some people who have everything all figured out and nailed down. But from where I'm standing it looks pretty much like exactly where I'm meant to be. And so I blogged about it, because what the hell else was I supposed to blog about today?

What's up in your world?


  1. Girl, you aren't alone. I think I am in the middle of my mid-life crisis as we speak. I have my ups and downs. Yesterday was bad. Like... really bad. And today has only just started soooo we will have to wait and see how things go. I have a personal blog post in mind, but I seriously don't know how to start it.... and end it. It will just be all over the damn place!

    When I was a big blogger, I did sponsored posts and stuff. To be honest?? It was too time consuming. And if you watch the page views, not many people read those type of posts. So I would skip it. Unless you have like 3k followers then have at it.

  2. Congratulations on signing up for the half marathon!

    Yesterday really felt like summer for the first time. It wasn't too hot, but it was sunny and okay, maybe it was the country music I was listening to, but it felt truly like summer and I could not have been happier about it.

    I hear you re: the second phase of a quarter-life crisis. I thought it was over, but it's back, and it's in full swing.

  3. Don't you just love the ability to write down everything you're thinking and feeling!!!??? Sounds like you are handling everything as it comes - as you should!! Just take it one day at a time and don't forget to enjoy it...and I'm sure you're going to rock that half marathon!!

  4. Good luck on the half! You will be fine. Be sure to stretch and foam roll...a lot! Make the foam roller your BFF and you will be in good shape!

  5. Look at you go ! Let me know when/which half you're doing and I'll see if I can get up there to be there at the finish line for you :) OR maybe I could convince you to postpone until November and we could run our first half together ?

    Regardless, I'm always in awe of how you always manage to have a handle on everything (whether you think you do or not) when you've got 50 bazillion things happening. If your quarter life crisis is any indication of how you'll be during a midlife crisis, the world better watch out because you could probably rule the whole world by then.

  6. I love this entire post!! I'm glad you entered the half marathon that's what my sister runs (her hubby runs full marathons). I just know you can totally do it (injury aside of course - I dont want you to get more injured).

    Congrats on getting an offer for a sponsored post! I actually sponsored a couple blogs this month and one had a giveaway and I have the same anxiety about it. Frankly I think people will think Im a sellout sigh... I may have one next month too because I plan to sponsor Amanda (meet @ the barre). I just hope the readers understand as I totally do! I say ALLLLL that babble to say bring on the sponsored posts hun I will still be reading (and then I called you 'hun' but Ill leave it since you dont mind terms of endearment ;) )

    Ok Im done hijacking your page.

  7. I am signed up for a 5k July 4 and am nervous enough about that. I am out of breath so quickly! I think a half marathon would give me stress breakdowns so I am totally impressed you are so motivated!

  8. ahh just take your training to heart and follow the program! also make sure you're doing other training and weights to help combat any little injury!

  9. I completely understand the concept of Phase 2. I was a little freaked at turning 21. Why, I'm not so sure. 25 was fine but it definitely led to a lot of reflection and introsepction. And I have a feeling that I'm on the verge of doing the same thing now. It's sor of like a reassessment of your life.

    I will absolutely be cheering for you for this half marathon! I think that's insanely awesome!

  10. I'm telling you I wish I found blogging when I was in my mid twenties like you....what an amazing way to document your life through writing and photos. I'll be thinking about you working for that half marathon....I swear girl I did one and it just killed my body....I just don't think I was born to run but I am always in awe of people who can! Congrats on your new blogging accomplishment! You have an influence and that is such an amazing thing! xoxoxo

  11. I think putting the half marathon out on your blog is a GOOD thing! You'll have lots of cheerleaders! :)

  12. I am SO excited about your half. You will do just fine, I have no doubt about it!
    I gotta say, I'm a little jealous of this new phase of your life. Gahhh, I would do anything to go back to being your age and having all the freedom to make choices in front of you. I regret a lot because I just rushed into things. But we live and learn.
    Congrats on all of the opportunity's you have coming up!

  13. HOW DID I MISS THIS?! (Oh wait, I know, I fell off the face of the earth last week). I'm SO EXCITED for you taking the plunge for your first half. You are going to be so ridiculously well-prepared. You totally got this!
    Girllll I feel you...I am starting to think my 20's are just one giant life crisis! :(

  14. yayyyyyy for your half!! you're gonna rock it fo sho. tell me more about it. wish we could do it together ;) i am thinking of doing one in october as well, we can virtually train together? lol jk.
    congrats, seriously lady, you deserve all the good things!

    1. also, please post the most random and crazy shit, i will always support you :)


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