The Mind, it Runs Crazy

For your what-the-hell-is-wrong-in-that-girl's-head enjoyment, I present to you: A sampling of thoughts I had during last night's run...
Alright, feeling good. Freshly adjusted, taped up. Feeling good.

Aaaaaand here comes the shoulder pain. Am I the only runner in the world whose shoulder acts up during a run? I really am a freak I guess.

Why is it that I only ever see these little empty nip bottles of Fireball littered along the side of the road? When was it decreed that Fireball is the only thing we're ever allowed to drink anymore?

Ugh, Fireball.

Who throws a pregnancy test out the window?

Wait, where was that pregnancy test taken? Because either she peed on the stick in the bathroom and then transported the pee stick out of the house where she or a friend or significant other tossed the evidence, most likely from a car window; or she took a pregnancy test right here on the side of the road. The tree line here is just not thick enough for that.

Oh, cigarette butts. I wonder when I'll completely stop craving you for good.

Another runner coming. Head up. Back straight. Chest up, eyes front, runner wave ready.

I hate when runners don't wave back or head nod.

YAASSSSS he acknowledged me as one of his kind.

Bug went straight into my eye.

Ooh Afrojack, you know how to get my heart pumpin'.

*humming* ten feet tAAAAAAAlllllllllll

I've never wanted to un-ironically fist pump more than I do right now. I'm killing this run and this song is everything.

JK, not killing anything, it's been like two miles.

Still though. Remember six months ago? When you couldn't even run this far if there were wild horses chasing you? It's pretty cool that you've got four races under your belt now.

A lot has changed in six months. A lot.

Okay, don't go there. We're not going to think about things that aren't part of our life anymore.

Until the song that reminds you of them comes on. Skip.

Swallowed a bug.

Skip. I said skip, damn it, not volume up. Shit. Not pause. Come on Apple, these headphones are garbage.

Remember to put "running headphones" on your list when you get home.

Okay, hill. It's you versus the glutes.

Jesus. Tapdancing. Christ. Shut up legs. Shut up butt. Shut up hips. Shut up glutes.

Whoooooooooooo damn girl, you be killin' 'em. Time to fly down this biddy.

Wait, seriously, another pregnancy test? Where are these girls coming from? I wonder if they were positive or negative. I hope a girl who thinks it's a good idea to throw a used pregnancy test into the street hasn't just gotten a positive read.

when a fire starts to burn

Damn, Disclosure is good running music.

I have to pee. Clench, clench, clench, clench, clench.

Running sucks but this is amazing right now.

Yeah, people who say runners are crazy are right. Now I gotta get 13.1 miles crazier.


  1. Dont you just hate when a song reminds you of them ugh!! I am fascinated by the pregnancy tests though and my curiosity would have gotten the better of me!

  2. OMG wtf is with shoulder pain, seriously?! I have to swing my arm sometimes to try and stop it hurting and I have hit many a passerby oops. Maybe we are too tense?
    Ugh Fireball indeed.
    I am so awkward when I see other runners, I do this awkward smile grimace thing. Not cute. Need to work on my wave.
    Oh fudge hills. I hate them with all the hate - but I have added them to my plan as they always screw me up come race time. My half has some hills (I can't work out what the elevation means, I'm too stupid) so I want to be prepared.
    OMFG I need to add that song to my playlist, I love love the start of it 'when a fire starts to burn' it makes me want to white girl dance like in 2 broke girls (am I the only one who watches that?)
    So I went for a run this morning, and I basically thought all of these except I don't see any pregnancy tests. WTF Jersey?!

  3. "JK, not killing anything, it's been like two miles." - BAHAHAHA...Every. Freaking. Time. Do you ever bargain with your body ? Like "Listen calves, if you stop hurting, I'll foam roll the sh*t out of you when I get'd like that !" Maybe I'm just weird.

    Thankfully not a lot of discarded pregnancy tests down here in Raleigh but running downtown there are so many people with dogs...which of course I have to stop and pet. It's okay because it's a "social run" and I'm just being "social"...with dogs.

  4. People toss the most ridiculous stuff on the side of the road- and the nastiest. I'm guessing the pregnancy tests were because someone didn't want them in the garbage where someone at home could find them?

  5. bahahahahaha this is hilarious girl! Whenever I run it's mainly me playing mind games with myself to see how far I've run "it's definitely been like a quarter of a mile..let's check....... .1 what the hell I swear I've been running for at least 5 minutes since the last time I checked!" Yes disclosure has the best beat ever for running!

  6. My arms hurt when I run and I havent figured out why.
    Seriously 2 pregnancy test WTF haha

  7. I have really bad circulation so my hands always go numb when I run - it's so annoying but I guess you just have to push through!

  8. I never had shoulder pain until last week and now I've started getting it at the beginning of my runs. It's like...on the front though so maybe that's not even really my shoulder at all but I don't know what it is. It's a tingly hurty feeling and I have no idea what the deal is.
    How did you manage to see not one but TWO discarded roadside pregnancy tests on ONE run? I've never even seen one on any run ever.
    The urge to start fist pumping, until I look down and realize it's only been 1.7 miles, happens to me every single time.

  9. Lmfao! I feel like I'm sitting in your head right now as you run. And holy freaking hell, pregnancy tests??!! Seriously, wtf. I wonder if it's from the same girl. Hahahaha.

  10. DUDE i get the shoulder pain anytime i run on the pavement! wtf


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