How to Have a Sick Day

First, it's important to ignore the tickle or scratch or tightening in your throat for a minimum of two to three days. Tell yourself it's just a little irritated from some irritant you must have come into contact with but cannot actually identify. Have two Halls cough drops in two days and think that'll do the trick.
Have two extra cups of tea, and put honey in both. Convince yourself that's actually a cure. When tea doesn't soothe the throat, switch to ice cream. When that doesn't work, go back to tea. Alternate between taking blankets off and putting them back on during this process.

Convince yourself that talking intermittently for 75 minutes in that one class you taught is totally enough to give yourself a constricted throat. Ignore the corresponding congestion and fuzzy-headedness, because you can't blame that on teaching a yoga class.

Sip on your third cup of tea while making a list of all the things you're going to do to be incredibly productive the next day. Write things like "run 4 miles" and "go to the post office" and other things that, when you swallow a sip of tea and feel your throat trying to murder you, sound like torture.

Go to sleep thinking a good night's rest will do the trick.

Wake up in a haze, blaming your lethargy on the fact that it's raining rather than the fact that you woke up every hour last night. Look at your to do list and convince yourself that it's still going to be a great and productive day!

Answer some emails from your couch, still refusing to give up on plans to get all the work done today. Tell yourself that working from home and being sick cancel each other out. Tell yourself that you can work in leggings and no bra, and that feeling like death is no reason not to work when you can work from your couch.

Rearrange your week so you can go to the post office and run tomorrow. But still plan to do all the work you planned to do today!

Realize that it's not even noon and it feels like you've been up for three days straight. Go lay on your bed just for a minute because it looks really inviting. Don't get under the covers. Maybe just tuck your feet under the blanket folded at the foot of the bed. That's plenty. Browse Reddit so you don't fall asleep, knowing that you'll sleep till tomorrow if you do.

Watch New Girl on Netflix all the while.

Rally yourself to answer some emails, send out some new ones, and write a couple things. Decide you've worked enough to treat yourself to some soup and a little break.

Remember the good old days when you used to get strep throat every few months and your doctor said you should have your tonsils removed. Wonder why it never happened when you were 12, and tell yourself that a tonsilectomy at age 26 is out of the question.

Contemplate a tonsilectomy every time you swallow.

Google the latest viral epidemic and sigh in relief when you don't see "sore throat" on the list of symptoms. But keep checking just in case they add it to the list.

Crowd-source blog readers for at-home remedies because you don't feel like going to the doctor.
Any favorite tips, friends?
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  1. I'm so sorry you're sick! No matter what I do, whether I try to ignore the impending sickness or remedy it before it gets worse, I always end up feeling like I got hit by a bus. I wish I had a magic cure for you :( Hope you feel better soon!

  2. My great aunt swore by a few shots of tequila that she kept around just for when she was sick. My elderly coworker swears by blackberry brandy. Something about alcohol killing germs? Personally I'm for tea, naps, cold meds, favorite movies/TV shows, comfiest sweats, and of course soup. Drink lots of fluids! Hope you feel better soon!

  3. This is the story of my life. Not sick, not sick, not sick, aaaaand dying of sickness.

  4. Sleep sleep sleep and keep up with tea and honey. My dr said honey is amazing for a sore throat. AND REST!

  5. Do it. Sleep the day away and forget your worries, lists and deadlines. Avoid human contact. Avoid torture. Welcome tea, honey. Welcome full-on blanket smothering. Ignore emails, especially mine!

  6. You have Zica, for sure. Or is it Zika? Ha, just kidding! I'm sorry you're not feeling well. Rest up, enjoy binge watching Netflix and napping, and hopefully you'll feel better soon!

  7. blech, being sick sucks big ones. hope you get better soon! just sleep the day away and cozy up with some warm team and fav reruns.

  8. Ugh, strep throat is NOT fun. I used to get it as a kid/teen a lot! Hope you feel better, rest and tea and New Girl is SURE to help :)

  9. You need a Hot Toddy. I'm telling you, you'll feel fine by Saturday.

    Biggest coffee cup you have:
    3 parts hot water (make tea)
    1 part OJ
    add some honey to taste
    add a shot of whisky

    I promise, it works.

  10. hahaha to the alternating between hot tea and ice cream. i totally do that. 'hot will make it feel better. cold will make it feel better. hot, cold'. lol.
    something my ex boyfriend's mother always did for me when i was sick or had a sore throat - glass of lemonade (sprite), warm up in the microwave, add honey. i haven't tried it since that guy and i broke up, but it worked all the times she gave me.

    though netflix and laying on the couch is normally my go to lol

    1. also, thank you for linking this post up with us :) hope you are feeling better dearie xx

  11. Rest, Vitamin D to boost the immune system and whatever else feels restful and healing :)

  12. So basically you're me ans Im you and we both should schedule throat removal surgeries. Read my post tomorrow - I sat ignoring the little man tickling my throat with a feather - my advice - go to the doc :(

  13. Yuuccckkk for being sick, friend!! I hope you feel better very soon! I normally Netflix, lay on the couch and alternate between tea and ice cream too, so I'm zero help really, lol.

  14. Love having an excuse to stay in bed all day and watch netflix. I don't like being sick, but I like having a day to relax!

  15. HAhahahah... I love the Google part! I'm totally guilty of that every time I feel any kind of symptom coming on.
    Hope you feel better soon. :(

  16. Michael's home remedy looks like my answer to every sore throat I will ever get in the future!!!! To this day, I give my mother a hard time for not allowing the doctor to remove my tonsils when I was a kid. Feel better, friend.

  17. Ugh, I'm so sorry you're sick! On the upside, this post cracked me up because it's exactly how I tackle being sick. I'm very much the "This is no excuse! You can still do everything!" kind of person until I eventually have to suck it up and realize that no, I can't.

    I wish I had a great home remedy for you. My husband is sick right now, and he's been sucking down tea and cough drops like there's no tomorrow. I'm just trying to get him to stay away from me as much as possible (though I won't lie: I started to feel that tickle in my throat tonight).

    I hope you feel better soon!

  18. Oh you poor thing! But that is JUST what I do when I'm sick!


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