18 Reasons I'm Actually Totally Dateable, I Swear

I think it's important to be honest with yourself about what you are, who you are, and what you bring to any equation—in business, at home, in relationships. I've spent a lot of my adult life to this point in introspective contemplation about who I am. What I can change about myself—what I should change about myself—and what is just the "price of admission" to pay for an interaction or relationship with me. For example, I can't help but talk with my hands, so if you're wearing a white dress near me, you'll want to put the pizza or red wine down.
As proof of this self-reflection and honesty, I offer this post I wrote a while back: Six things I totally confess make me borderline undateable. However, as that's been rendered untrue and I actually *gasp* have a date this weekend, I think it's important to go in prepared and spend some time reflecting on reasons I'm not totally undateable. Ladies and gentlemen, here's why I swear I really am a great date:

  • I'll almost never say no to grabbing a meal, so date-planning needn't be difficult. Just feed me.
  • When I say "I don't care" in response to the food options you've presented, I really don't care. I can eat sushi, pizza, or Mexican food 100% of the time and I literally cannot choose between them.
  • I never say "I'm fine" when I'm not fine.
  • I think public fighting is super tacky and will never engage in a Ron and Sammi brawl.
  • I don't require over-the-top romantic gestures. In fact, they make me super uncomfortable. Don't bring me flowers. 
  • When I offer to pay or split the check, I mean it.
  • I'll drive.
  • Unless you want to, and you know where we're going better than I do.
  • My Spotify has something for everybody, so I will let you have input on car music. Also if we take my car we can listen to 90s on 9, which is all anyone really needs.
  • It's my reflex to take my bra off Flashdance-style the minute I walk in the door to my apartment.
  • I'm starting to learn how to be better about not letting little annoyances turn me off completely. I'm getting there.
  • I won't be offended if you tell me I'm being annoying, because you'll be right. And then I will try to stop.
  • I'm very intuitive so you probably won't have to tell me.
  • Don't worry, I'll clean the kitchen after dinner. Seriously. No, stop. Just don't bother, you're doing it wrong anyway.
  • I know all the words to "Ice Ice Baby" in case we happen to find ourselves in the middle of an impromptu lip sync battle.
  • I'll never ask you to hold my purse when I go into a store. And for that matter, never ask you to come clothes shopping with me because I hate clothes shopping and turn into a She-Devil when I have to do it. I want to get in and out and you'll just slow me down.
  • My apartment is always clean. I've actually been made fun of before for having it the same level of clean whether I am or am not expecting company.
  • I'm really good at pub trivia.

One at a time, gents.


  1. Well I've always known that you have a ton to offer!! Hope you have a great date!! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

  2. Hope you have fun on your date! Offering to let a guy have input on the car music is a BIG deal to me haha, so I hope this guy realizes how lucky he is!

  3. Love this list!

    Over the top romantic gestures also make me really uncomfortable. Not all women want that! LOL

    Have a great time!

  4. We all make ourselves sound low maintenance until it comes right down to it.

    Wait... I don't really make myself sound that way, actually.

    "Low maintenance" is just a loaded term anyway. It's how guys measure our ability to tolerate their putting video games before us.

  5. This is such a fun post! I'm totally with you on always being able to eat pizza, Mexican, and sushi. Seriously, my 3 favorite food groups!

  6. This made me LOL. Especially the coming straight home & taking the bra off bit, because, that's certainly a dateable quality if you ask me. Haha.

    I needed something like this to make me laugh when I had blind date after blind date with guys who ended up being super weird.

  7. Hahaha I love this! Clearly you are totally date-able! I want to ride in your car for 90's on 9. And I know all the words to Ice Ice Baby too :) Super romantic gestures make me feel awkward too.

  8. Have an awesome date! You're super date able! I'd add your yoga flexibility to the list too ;) ;)

  9. love this! i'm with you - why would anyone say "i'm fine" when clearly, you're not?

  10. Yes! 90s on 9 is all you need for sure!! So you know Ice, Ice Baby but do you have Baby Got Back ready? Those two jams are what I pull out to prove I could totally be a rapper if I wanted to. haha I hope you have a wonderful date and I hope your date reads this post prior to the date so they truly understand how lucky they are!

  11. Love this-- I've never been an I'm fine, when I'm not person either, I think it's my overwhelming amount of feelings most of the time that I could never imagine just keeping something in, haha. Also, I hope your date went well?!!

  12. I've never understood why someone would want to go shopping with their significant other! Unless they happen to be the same gender, in which case they can shop together. But yeah, have Ryan sit outside while I try stuff on? Just no. I'll feel rushed and guilty for inconveniencing him and he'll be bored and whiny. There is no win there for anyone. I'd much rather shop alone.

    I also refuse to argue in public - save that shit for the privacy of our own home, and I'm super easy going about food, so there's basically no wrong choice. Unlike you, I am a huge sap for romantic gestures and I'm guilty of using "fine" to mean "go fuck yourself." But sometimes it really does mean fine. It never means "come talk to me, I want attention" so I guess that's something. I'm either actually fine or I need to be left alone so I can return to being fine again.

  13. "Don't worry, I'll clean the kitchen after dinner. Seriously. No, stop. Just don't bother, you're doing it wrong anyway."

    ^^Story of every relationship I've ever been in.

  14. Love everything on this list. I think public fighting is absolute nonsense as well btw.

  15. hahaha i don't talk with my hands but if you are near me with red wine or pizza, you might want to just step away regardless because i am more likely to spill or knock things on other people than myself.
    but really, love all of this and i am similar in most ways... i don't like to drive so will always want someone else to do it, and i am one of those people who will say i don't care to 'where do you want to eat?' but then shoot down every option that KC gives me.. sorry. But for the most part I don't care ;) public fighting is embarrassing, and I hope over the top romantic gestures and flowers die. and you know I love to shop, but I hate hate hate hate hate shopping with KC. Or anyone really, except my mum.

  16. "Stahhhhp it Roooon!" Ahh, thank you for that visual! Fighting in public makes me super uncomfortable even when it's other people. And YES to 90's on 9! This is such a great list and a fun post idea. I hope your date went well!

  17. FYI, basically all of these are things that make you totally friendable too :)
    Any relationship extreme is weird to me, from public fighting to over-the-top gestures. You can like someone a lot and still treat them like a normal person! You can also disagree with them without starting World War III.
    And hi I need to know more about this date! I know you mentioned it in an email, don't think you just slipped that one past me!

  18. Love this list! I also feel as though I strongly identify with several - especially the kitchen one. Seriously. It's my domain, just get out.


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