What I've Been Doing While I Haven't Been Here

And just like that, we were closer to 2017 than to 2015. I don't generally like to make statements about how quickly time is moving—that's what it does, right? It moves along, and we move along with it—but it does feel a little surprising that we're already so far along into the summer (especially since it took so long to reach us here in NJ, I think). 

I feel like sometimes time feels like it's moving so quickly because we don't take the time to reflect on all that's really been happening. Days and weeks do end up kind of blurring together when you don't pause to see them individually, ya know? But stepping back and looking at the past month, it's crazy to see how much has gone on...

What's New With You

In work news...
As I've written several times over the past few months, I'm very much over the freelance life. I've been looking for jobs off and on over the last year (and really, over the last two years, but I left my job one year and one week ago so these past 12 months have had a different flavor on them). I've felt lucky to have freelance opportunities to keep me afloat, but this is not the work life I'm after. So I'm doing everything I can to change that. Or at least, I thought I was.

Last week was hard. I had a breakdown, and then another. I absolutely hit my limit of shit and mistreatment I can take, and it turned out to be exactly what I needed to realize that I actually wasn't doing everything I could. I was setting moronic boundaries on my job search out of fear, and baseless fear at that. I kicked those walls down though and am now feeling 10,000 pounds lighter than before. There's still nothing worth reporting, but I have more faith in the process than ever. If you have a spare positive thought to send my way, I'd appreciate your good vibes.

In blog news...
Tracy and I decided to close down our Training for Tuesday linkup without any fanfare (and with barely a goodbye—sorry!) this month. I think it's clear that both of us have been kind of phoning it in lately. We seem to have enough trouble showing up here at all, let alone with prescribed content. I'm fighting the occasional urge to abandon all efforts here, and what keeps me hanging on is the knowledge of how much I would miss this platform if I closed it down. This season of my life will end, and I will be in a position again where I rely on alyssagoesbang.com to be my primary outlet of creativity. Thanks for bearing with me until I get back to that place.

In relationship news...
It's hard to believe but I've passed the two-months-official mark with the bald man. His name is David, by the way. I think that's okay to say now. We're hitting fun and interesting milestones and very soon we'll see the biggest one yet: our first trip together.

In travel news...
On a related note, I cannot wait to say "hello" once again to Washington, D.C.! I feel like I've spent a lot of time there in the past few years, the last trip just this past April, but there's so much to do and so many reasons to be there—I'm certainly not complaining. This next trip will include some meals with friends new and old, some tourist-y exploring I haven't done much of in nearly two decades, some yoga (because of course) and some miles with my favorite running buddy!

In Alyssa news...
In case you missed it, I wrote a book. It's the verbal expression of some of the most emotionally-charged moments of my young adult life. It's available for Kindle and e-reader apps here.

I did yoga in Times Square with a few thousand of my nearest and dearest (and one in particular) and then got pooped on by a pigeon, because life is all about balance.

Fourth of July weekend—aka Cousins Weekend, as it's known in my family—has come and gone and I can't believe it. It came immediately after Dave Matthews Weekend, and just like that, two of my favorite weekends of the year are a wrap. Here's hoping that the rest of 2016 is filled with many more fun and exciting ones with new adventures.

Early this year, I decided that my word or theme for 2016 was going to be "release." It was pretty recently that I realized I was actually doing nothing to adhere to that declaration. Aside from a few physical purges of clothing and those little things that add up around the household (how is it that every single time I find more to get rid of? I swear I am RUTHLESS with each purge!) I wasn't doing much to release mental and emotional baggage. I'd been holding onto relationships (both personal and professional), responsibilities, and duties that I have no real reason to hold onto, other than some misguided feeling of obligation or guilt. I'd also been tying myself to parameters that do nothing but box me in and prevent me from seeking good or better things. So now, halfway through the year, I'm really trying to recommit to that yearly intention. Here's hoping the second half of the year sees more release than the first.


And that about sums it up. What's new with you?
Linking up with Kristin and Gretchen.

Comments

  1. you've been super busy these days! with summer and life, blogging often takes a back seat. i often find myself struggling to write as well; i'll sit down, start a draft and then abandon it.

    so happy that you and Dave are hitting great milestones together!

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  2. Let that shit go homie! RELEASE!

    Many good vibes on the job front.

    Excited for your relationship milestones, first trip together is big!

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  3. Release . . . I like that! Seems easier said than done though, don't you think! As always, wish you much luck on the job front . . . it will happen! And cheers to two months . . . awesome!

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  4. i am with you on time flying by. i hate when people say that but then i say it as well, haha. yay! where are you and david going? or is he going with you on your DC trip? hope you and tracy have tons o fun! can't wait to see you all in november, it will be here before we know it right?! and double yay for feeling lighter on the job searching front, all of my positive thoughts your way.

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  5. Ladies and gents, we have a NAME! YAY! Very excited for you two! Where are ya headed? So sorry to hear that you had a breakdown, but sometimes you need to break down in order to build yourself back up and regain some perspective. Sending all the positive vibes on the job-finding front! Hope you find your release friend!

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  6. Eeee this makes me so happy! Well, mostly. Not the bit about work, but I am glad that your breakdown forced you to change your perspective, and all my good vibes and positive thoughts that something good comes of it. Also a bummer about the linkup and blogging in general (nearly every post I've started writing over the last few months has ended with me being thisclose to just shutting down the whole thing). And the bird popping on your head.
    But YAY David and yay that you'll be here so soon!!! And kudos for the last paragraph. This might be a weird question, but how does it make you feel to emotionally let go of things? I feel myself naturally shrugging things off more and more, which is mostly a good thing, but then I feel guilty because like...why don't I care? I should care, right? Does that even make sense?

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  7. Wow, I have been wanting to join in on those yoga classes in the parks in NY but I don't know where to find out about them (days and times etc).

    Sucks you got pooped on tho...but it's suppose to be good luck. :D

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  8. I understand the job search struggle, I really do. Although it's been a long time since I was in a really bad place (for me) professionally, I remember it like it was yesterday: the rejection, the fear that I would never find the right job (or a job at all), taking something that didn't feel quite right out of desperation ... The list goes on and on. I'm not the most optimistic person in the world, but I can honestly say that things eventually have a way of working themselves out. I changed positions several times (and even moved a couple of times as well) before things began to fall into place. And, while I wouldn't say I have my "dream" job, I really enjoy what I do, love my boss and coworkers, and am generally satisfied with my work life. Hang in there.

    On a happier note, congrats on passing the two month mark with the new man! :-) My first "official" trip with my now husband was after about 4 months of dating, and I knew if we could survive an 8 hour road trip, we would probably be okay. Haha. (I say "official" because we actually met while on a trip, but I don't think that counts.)

    Hooray for D.C.! I haven't been in such a long time, but I'll actually be there in September for a work conference. I'm looking forward to going back and hoping I'll have some time to get out and do some stuff.

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  9. Woohoo to you and David!!! I hope you know I keep reading though Im barely around myself (I do miss it I just dont know why I havent posted any of the 500 drafted things ...)

    You're in my thoughts with the continued job hunt and I'm buying the book this weekend :D (I think I explained why I haven't yet)

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  10. Wishing you all the luck with finding a job. It's always scary when you're trying to switch paths in life (I should know since I just did it myself) but I hope it goes smoothly and you're happier. Going to get your book right now! Thanks for linking up :)

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  11. I totally get setting boundaries that you feel you fit in to when you are searching but girl you got to let that go!!! There are no boundaries when it comes to dreams and you are meant for great things! Happy 2 months :)

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  12. Woohoo no boundaries! I feel like I have the opposite problem sometimes and even when I'm not job searching, I feel like I should apply to every position. Positions that don't even make sense. Hiring: lemur cage poop cleaner, and I all I would think would be, "I like lemurs. I should do that." I get app happy with job applying. I see stores in the mall and think about how much I like that store before realizing I do not want to work there every day. All the same, I am familiar with the job search and it is not fun either way. Sending more good wishes your way in your search. Once again, you do awesome things and I hope you find something for you.

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  13. I'm saving all convo for Saturday. For now, I'll just say that this week I have been acutely aware that time is speeding by... and it makes me feel.. unsettled.

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  14. The start of each month has me wondering what happened to the previous month and how it went by so darn fast. How strange it is that as a kid time goes so slow and you are always waiting for it to tick by for some reason or another. As an adult I can hardly get everything I honestly need done in a day. I am always needing more time! Blogging can be so hard to keep up on sometimes - I know that I have had my fair share of struggles :) All of my positive thoughts are being sent your way!

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